Changes

My life has changed so much since I started this blog.  I haven't been writing in here but I miss writing.  I miss talking about my life and putting my thoughts somewhere.  I love this picture of this bench outside in a place where everything is changing all around it.  That's how I feel.  Like everything all around me is in a constant state of change.  That's really the only thing we can depend on isn't it?  That nothing will ever stay the same.  I started my bulldog business 7 years ago when I bought Tank and Harley and never dreamed it would evolve into a business that supports me completely without having to work anywhere else.  I love it too.  I love having baby bulldog around me constantly and an endless supply of puppy breath.

I can't think of anything I'd rather do than love on these amazing dogs and have them in my life.  It's such a privilege to pass them over to a family who loves them and will cherish them for their whole lives.  I've started losing weight too.  I've lost 14 pounds since the end of August.  I have to lose 6 more this month to be on track.  My goal is 10 pounds a month till Christian's wedding.  I have to do it.  I can't keep carrying around all this weight, it's literally killing me.  Taryn moved out and my world suddenly got very quiet.  I cried for a few days but after I got a bit used to it I liked it a lot.  I liked the personal freedom of being able to make all my own choices.  Control my mood and be happy all the time with myself.  Ruger and Mugsy are such great dogs too, they are my companions now and they follow me everywhere.  We've gotten much closer since it's just me and them.

I also got a cat.  Her name is Mina.  That's the name of the woman who killed Dracula.  She's jet black, almost blue in color and a total sweetheart.  I inherited her from Kate and Christian when they adopted their dog Bongo.  I couldn't ask for a better baby girl.  She loves being outside though and hangs on the screen when she wants back in the house which is ruining my brand new screen door I just put in this year.  I can't break her of it though because it's what she's used to.  She slips out the door at night and around 4am I hear her howling to be let in.  She stalks around the backyard like she's on a safari or something.  She won't go anywhere but I've watched her prowl after the dogs when they go outside to go potty and it's hilarious, she really thinks she's a huge giant cat out in the wild.  She's more like the one in this picture!  LOL

I'm excited to look FAB-ewe-LOUS in my clothes once all this fat is gone.  I know it isn't going to happen overnight.  My goal is a loft one.  100 pounds in a year.  There are going to be months when it's going to be so hard to do but I'm focusing on ME for the first time since before I had children.  I bought myself a car!  A black Toyota Rav4 and I LOVE IT!!  I'm seriously thinking of selling the Ray-mobile and seeing what I can get for it.  I've taken such great care of that little convertible and I hope I would be able to get 10K for it come spring and that way I can pay down the Rav4 faster.  It's a 2012 and the dogs like it a lot and ride in the back with the seats down.  I love Ray's car.  I don't want to sell it but I can't stand to see it driven into the ground by one of my children either.  Not one of them would take care of it and I need it to be intensely loved.  I might not sell it.  I haven't completely decided yet.  Anyway it feels good to be writing again.  I'm on my way to great success on many levels here.

Adele